A haul

...lotta stuff. Eyy.

Of course I didn’t write anything in May, the annual monthlong existential crisis about getting older. Here’s what I did instead: Tell my therapist that I like being married even more after five years than I did at first, which is probably the only reassuring thing she’s ever heard me say. “Most people go the other way,” she deadpanned in response. After years of empty threats, I dyed my hair blonde, and now vacillate daily between dread that I’ve ruined my previously unadulterated, freakishly healthy hair and dread that I’ll spend the rest of my life overpaying to maintain the new hue. Spent a blissful week with my brand new niece talking about how much happier I’d be if my whole world was only as big as a baby’s needs. Bored everyone around me by excessively litigating what I should do to celebrate a birthday that I was dreading. Didn’t do anything. Got older anyway.

Fortunately, I also acquired So Much Stuff that we have no time to dwell on how being a woman means that people tell you you’re smart and interesting a lot less the older you get even though you’re pretty sure you know more than used to. Maybe you were never smart at all, just precocious. And maybe you were never even precocious, you were just young.

Let’s get to the goods.

Someone should buy…

  • Miami Marlins Butterfly Garden Cap, because it’s the only hat left from the New Era MLB x For Every Little Thing collaboration. I own too many hats already as an occupational necessity, but I would have been tempted by the Padres one if it wasn’t already sold out.

  • L-Bomb Necklace from Studiocult. I’m about the last person on earth to decide with a fervor that I need to be layering lots of gold necklaces and this simultaneously nostalgic and zeitgeisty/earnest and witty one is exactly the sort of thing I have in mind. If it actually had any relation to my real life.

I’m eyeing…

  • I actually already pulled the trigger on a bikini set from Cuup. When the size-inclusive underwear brand launched swimwear with the option to buy a top in my hard-to-find size, it just made sense. Except, I sort of hate the aesthetic of underwire bathing suits. I’m holding out hope that the fit is so good it sways me, but in the meantime I’m adding various Monday Swimwear items to the virtual cart. The brand specializes in serious support — with and without underwire — for small people with big boobs. I own (and overwear) their Jamaica Top in a crinkle fabric lime green. It’s great. If they had better color options now, I’d probably get a second one.

  • There’s absolutely no reason to stall for as long as I have on acquiring my annual Tevas — but I just can’t decide which of several similar iterations I want.

  • Our oft-photographed duvet cover is from a Philly-based tie-dye company, Riverside Tool & Dye. It’s got a rip in it recently, though, and despite Jake’s lifelong quest to switch to a quilt so as to avoid having to put the duvet back in the cover, I am probably going to just replace it with the same thing. And when I do, I might get this earth tones sweatshirt, too. Since I like to think I’m the only person in New York who has heard of Philadelphia, I was furious when The Strategist recommended one from Riverside as an under-the-radar cool hoodie. But now I just think they’re making a mockery of the fact that I don’t own one. Yet.

If you’ve made it this far, here’s a very good baseball video as a reward. Let’s all strive to be more like Brett Phillips. See ya next time.