Of course I didn’t write anything in May, the annual monthlong existential crisis about getting older. Here’s what I did instead: Tell my therapist that I like being married even more after five years than I did at first, which is probably the only reassuring thing she’s ever heard me say. “Most people go the other way,” she deadpanned in response. After years of empty threats, I dyed my hair blonde, and now vacillate daily between dread that I’ve ruined my previously unadulterated, freakishly healthy hair and dread that I’ll spend the rest of my life overpaying to maintain the new hue. Spent a blissful week with my brand new niece talking about how much happier I’d be if my whole world was only as big as a baby’s needs. Bored everyone around me by excessively litigating what I should do to celebrate a birthday that I was dreading. Didn’t do anything. Got older anyway.
Fortunately, I also acquired So Much Stuff that we have no time to dwell on how being a woman means that people tell you you’re smart and interesting a lot less the older you get even though you’re pretty sure you know more than used to. Maybe you were never smart at all, just precocious. And maybe you were never even precocious, you were just young.
Let’s get to the goods.
Two-tone sweater dress from Staud (seen above). I spent a good chunk of my last newsletter weighing outrageous options for my anniversary, which we celebrated by treating Williamsburg like the tourist destination it is (sorry not sorry), enjoying our first dinner out since last summer at Llama Inn (go, get the bok choy salad, thank me later) and falling asleep to baseball by 11 pm — but, like, in a hotel. I generally hate dresses and am prone to buyer’s remorse and yet I can’t stop mentally applauding myself for how perfect this dress was for the occassion. I was comfortable, I looked extremely hot, and you would be hard-pressed to tell me I was over- or under-dressed for literally any celebratory occassion.
We poked around the Brooklyn Flea and Artists and Fleas while in Williamsburg and I bought: a kids-sized Mets hat for my infant-sized niece; a tags-on vintage silk and cotton suit that makes me look like a cool WNBA coach, but still needs to be tailored; and this graffiti train t-shirt from a small streetwear brand because never enough white t-shirts. Jake bought me a 1990 “name”plate necklace that is not vintage from Awoke Vintage (which has great vintage!) because not being an ‘80s baby is the only thing that still makes me feel young. I haven’t taken it off since.
A bunch of stuff from…Skims. I’m not sure what possessed me to drop $160 on non-sustainable items that enrich Kim Kardashian, but lemme just say: the lady knows her way around a flattering tank top (and, in all seriousness, the very real skill of building and marketing a brand!!!). Some choices were more rash than others. For instance, I know enough to know that a “fits everybody” bra will absolutely not fit me (I kept it anyway). The “fits everybody” bodysuit (seen below on the dreaded birthday) was slightly better, but I still am in the market for an actually supportive wear-without-a-bra bodysuit. The $34 cotton rib tank top though? Platonic Ideal. That I wore it the day I dyed my hair blonde when I knew there would be photos was not the tiniest bit incidental. The basic underwear is all excellent, too.
A vintage champion sweatshirt from one of my favorite vintage sportswear dealers, The Felt Fanatic. Expect to see this a Whole Lot in cooler weather.
Recycled Cotton Adventure Joggers from Back Beat Co. They’re probably not worth the price and I feel like the ankle elastic should be tighter if it’s going to be there at all, but the color is great and I can’t complain about how comfortable they are.
For the exhaustively aforementioned birthday: Jake got me my very own, long coveted, pair of stupidly expensive RE/DONE patchwork upcycled Levi’s. The were about a foot too long for me, but after tailoring I regret to inform you that they are the Coolest Thing I Own By Far And Worth Every Penny (If Someone Else Is Paying). I got myself a ‘90s-inspired itty bitty shoulder bag from Hyer Goods in brown to assert that I’m not too old for trends. I already have a wallet from them because nothing works on me quite like a sustainability-driven small business and sought out their first in-person pop up on purpose because I knew I wanted to support them and spoil myself. I wish I had better pictures of both of these!! I wore them both (and the perfect Skims tank top) for my first Night Out since before the world almost ended and had too good a time to take anything but a series of blurry bathroom pics.
Featured prominently in those photos is a scrunchie from Girlfriend Collective that I tossed into my cart when buying a brown bike-short-and-sports-bra-set recently. I need to exchange the bike shorts for a bigger size but the Paloma bra is everything I always hope these longline could-be-crop-tops sports bras will be. I bought a small for my not-small boobs and it is comfortable and supportive. Expect pics when I can pair it with the matching bottoms. I’ve been wearing a couple of old Outdoor Voices sports bras way too much lately and I think this breathes, fits, and looks better. (The scrunchie is also very good.)
Someone should buy…
Miami Marlins Butterfly Garden Cap, because it’s the only hat left from the New Era MLB x For Every Little Thing collaboration. I own too many hats already as an occupational necessity, but I would have been tempted by the Padres one if it wasn’t already sold out.
L-Bomb Necklace from Studiocult. I’m about the last person on earth to decide with a fervor that I need to be layering lots of gold necklaces and this simultaneously nostalgic and zeitgeisty/earnest and witty one is exactly the sort of thing I have in mind. If it actually had any relation to my real life.
I actually already pulled the trigger on a bikini set from Cuup. When the size-inclusive underwear brand launched swimwear with the option to buy a top in my hard-to-find size, it just made sense. Except, I sort of hate the aesthetic of underwire bathing suits. I’m holding out hope that the fit is so good it sways me, but in the meantime I’m adding various Monday Swimwear items to the virtual cart. The brand specializes in serious support — with and without underwire — for small people with big boobs. I own (and overwear) their Jamaica Top in a crinkle fabric lime green. It’s great. If they had better color options now, I’d probably get a second one.
Our oft-photographed duvet cover is from a Philly-based tie-dye company, Riverside Tool & Dye. It’s got a rip in it recently, though, and despite Jake’s lifelong quest to switch to a quilt so as to avoid having to put the duvet back in the cover, I am probably going to just replace it with the same thing. And when I do, I might get this earth tones sweatshirt, too. Since I like to think I’m the only person in New York who has heard of Philadelphia, I was furious when The Strategist recommended one from Riverside as an under-the-radar cool hoodie. But now I just think they’re making a mockery of the fact that I don’t own one. Yet.
If you’ve made it this far, here’s a very good baseball video as a reward. Let’s all strive to be more like Brett Phillips. See ya next time.